May, Thoughts, Grievances, & FF14

A perfect May Friday! Going to be 70 degrees. Sun is shining and I am in a writing mood!

I have a Final Fantasy 14 song playing in the background. I thought I was over the game until I got back from vacation and I caught the playing bug again. I finally reached the most recent expansion, Dawntrail, and I've fallen back in love with the game. It just is so damn fun! Especially this morning's dungeon! I like to get in line for a dungeon and was the dishes as a I wait. I decided to hop on my White Mage and this Endwalker dungeon was out of this world since the ninja and red mage kept getting destroyed by mechanics. But! This is what makes being a healer exciting and engaging! Me and the tank were the reasons why we made it through to the end after a billion resurrections done on the NIN & RDM. Astrologian will always be my favorite to play, but I've been leveling up Reaper and it has been a blast! RDM & PCT are also favorites of mine.

Anywho! I just journaled all about my recent vacation to Florida. Universal & Disney. Harry Potter Land! Epcot was one of my favorites beside Diagon Alley. Magic Kingdom...was much better at night.

I forgot to bring my normal case of markers so I'm just using whatever is available at my dad's house in his junk bags haha.

I reflected on my path in life, my craft, my experiences, and all of the unknown left before me. Oh man, how intimidating!

All the changes. I discontinued piano lessons and I'm upset about that, but the studio is raising the prices and I can't justify another year of lessons at that price. I'll miss my teacher! He is fucking great and I enjoyed hanging out with him and learning from him. I just hope I continue playing the piano! I have to!

Spring 2025 into Summer 2025. I scored Lady Gaga tickets for September and it'll be my 5th show of hers! I don't care about celebrity culture and what not, but I love me some Gaga and her music.

I'm left wondering where to go with my business. At the end of the day, I love to READ. To Play the Intuitive Instrument. Let's say life would be a lot easier (and probably more financially abundant) if I cared about social media, wanted all the attention, and parroting all the pop-spiritual nonsensical talk. I just love the Craft of Reading.

I reflect on all of my experiences. Complete unexpected beauties with a few awful, hurtful experiences throughout the years since 2018 doing readings professionally. I still have much healing to do to mend those wounds and my recent decision to completely turn off all "spiritual" shit on the internet has helped me greatly. I feel a return to the energy of when I started in 2018, but with the wisdom extracted from my Direct Experiences.

Reading my Ideal Clients are my favorite fucking thing about this work. Those who understand how I can help them and how my skills actually are in reality - the TOOL of Readings. Observing my Psychic System just be flooded by impressions/thought patterns. Hearing my client validate what I receive to be accurate while also having them tuck away what they cannot validate (which is always married with information that can be validated). Hearing them say "Thank you" and just feeling like I really have helped them! That is GOLD.

I feel like I'm just experiencing everyone else who are confronted with having to decide between staying in one's integrity or just becoming a copy of everyone else. To be an individual and feel confident in oneself. Just operating a psychic business is a tad more...no it is very different than a "standard" business haha. This business brought me many great moments and also a lot of grievances and pain.

To Read. That is my objective. Just READ. That's all I ever want to do.

But my god, I'd rather be in a ditch than return to reading at psychic fairs, restaurant readings, and reading around alcohol. A big Hellllll No!